Commonwealth Day Celebrations

What Commonwealth? What Celebrations?

Well, this event seems to have gone mostly unnoticed. However, the Queen celebrated it by attending a Commonwealth Day Observance Ceremony at Westminster Abbey. There were also several members of the Commonwealth nations in attendance: Hugh Masekela, a South Africa musician, performed at this particular gathering of global peoples.

This moveable feast, is celebrated annually on the second Monday in March, and this year the theme was Connecting Cultures. The service in Westminster Abbey was to ‘explore the golden threads that tie together people from every continent, faith and ethnicity.’ This was achieved through a mix of world music, dance and personal testimonies to around 1,000 selected heads of states, official dignitaries, faith leaders and school children.

In the past there were national exhibitions and parties to celebrate this connection within Commonwealth countries, now there is a whisper in the British media to mark its occurrence. I wonder if the origins and links of the Commonwealth have, at last, become an embarrassment to the British monarchy and nation.

The Commonwealth (aka the colonial British Commonwealth) was first set up in 1949 with eight member countries. As of today, 12^th March 2012 - Commonwealth Day, there were 54countries that were members of the Commonwealth. It is now referred to as the modern Commonwealth because it is now an association of free and equal member from independent countries who are linked by shared values, goals and equal votes in all matters.

Queen Elizabeth II, marking 60 years as head of theCommonwealth, said: “This year, our Commonwealth focus seeks to explore how we can share and strengthen the bond of Commonwealth citizenship we already enjoy by using our cultural connections to help bring us even closer together, as family and friends across the globe."

My question is, ‘What does the Commonwealth mean to you?’ To me it does not mean anything sweet or pleasant. The bitterness of colonialism still resonates in daily life – especially in the failure to give a rounded historical account of the colonial times in British schools. This leads to ‘unconscious bias’appearing in the everyday life of people whose only real experience of African, Caribbean or Indian life comes from the Eurocentric education or the occasional story of forced economic migration heard from a grand-parent.

I don’t think that the Commonwealth ever had any respectability, I would further suggest that it has now lost all veneer of respectability. This muted celebration confirms my views.

R.I.P. Commonwealth of Nations. The wealth of nations is anything but common.

On Whose Authority?

I think Christianity has some excellent points. I also think many of them get lost behind the religiosity of many organisations.

This recent Sabbath I was sitting in church between Sabbath School and Divine Service and the room was unusually quiet. This is a time when people spent their moments in reflective thoughts or prayer or join in rousing hymns of praise together: neither seemed to be occurring this week.

As a fellow member walked past, I asked him if he would lead the singing. He is both a vocalist and an instrument player. He declined, saying, “I’m just a visitor, I need to be asked.” I laughed and said, “Well I’m asking you.”

His response shocked me. “You have no authority here,” was his immediate retort, “you can’t ask me.” 

Now, I know that he is an official member at the other local church and my church membership is held in a different county but it made me wonder how much praise was regulated by officialdom.

“I get my authority from God,” was my instant reply.

This drew laughter from him but he still did not feel able to go against the forms and customs of the local congregation and so went back to his seat with a smile.

Does God have to wait for the deacons, elders and pastors to regulate His praise before it can commence?

I was left wondering on whose authority Christianity was being regulated. It appears God is not front and centre any more.

Elizabeth Taylor – outdone

Rumour has it that Elizabeth Taylor liked to keep people waiting. There was even an edict to make sure that she was late to her own funeral. She was a legend in life and will – I’m sure - be a legend in her death. Although she will long be remembered one incident of outstanding lateness will outshine even Dame Elizabeth Taylor in my mind.

I don’t like being late to events where I’m invited but the traffic diversions and ensuing delays meant I was bound to arrive at a ceremony after it was due to start: I was beginning to feel mortified and called the family with my apologies as the hour was fast approaching.

I need not have worried; they still weren’t dressed and hadn’t left their accommodation yet. We arrived late (by our standards) but later – much later – I realised just how early I really was. After driving around 80 miles we waited in the car. And waited. Then, as a change of activity, we waited some more!

Nearly an hour after we’d arrived I called the hosts again. This time there was no answer. I thought they must be on their way. But this was not the case, after some – waiting, there was a ... no show.

I called again, this time I was told they were just leaving the house (something I’d be told when I was stuck in traffic a good while (and many miles) before.

While I waited I saw a few people arrive at the chosen location – they obviously knew something I did not. There was no sense of urgency about their arrival. Every guest had the same invitation but these people rolled in with a casual air. It was immediately obvious that nothing was going to happen for a long time yet. So I decided to go elsewhere for a while as nothing was happening at the celebration venue. When I returned about 45 minutes later I felt as if I had committed treason or at least some great breach of social etiquette.

But, again I sat and waited for the main celebrants to arrive.

When they did turn up (laden with excuses but not apologies for the delay) it was a full three hours after the party should have started. It was then that I thought that Elizabeth Taylor had been outdone!

Most of the guests turned up after this.

This led me to the conclusion that either I was not part of that social network that knew you had to add three plus hours to the official start time or I existed in a different time zone and held a distinct set of social standards. Incredulity remained with me for the rest of the evening.

So, this is an apology to the memory of Elizabeth Taylor who carefully nurtured her reputation over seventy years – and who even kept visitors to her own house waiting for her to enter a room – sorry, but you have been outdone.

Channels of thought

It is good to listen and it is good to help. But you really have to know when to block the communications off.

If you do not then you can become a channel for an unrestricted flow of unpleasantness.

I think I am a fairly open person and I do like to listen to others; it is by listening that I have learnt so much about what people really want and what they are like. However, I have realised that there comes a time when some routes of communication must be blocked from my end.

I have accepted that some of my relationships with people are based on how they feel at the time and whether or not they want to talk to me. These relationships are like a one way street. Usually I don’t disturb this flow and keep the way open for all access from them at any time. But I know that this is not the healthiest way forward for me. This is because I have seen repeated patterns of behaviour that are simply defined as blatant abuse and disregard for my feelings or opinions.

I have found my own purest thoughts are those I write down – when I am undisturbed.

It was when I was re-reading some diary entries from the last decade that I was reminded of how channelling other people’s pain can lead to living in your own abyss of intensified suffering.

My ex-partner and my family never got on; at the time that saddened me deeply. Now, I am older and have more coping skills, back then I was in the middle of their non-communications and it hurt badly to hold on to some comments – hiding them – and to request others were withheld. I have found that so often people would say to me, “I have to say this ...” regardless of the fact I have politely asked them not to. Then they would plough in with words like sharp swords cutting away at my heart ribbon by ribbon.

So now my choice is that when people insist on trying to push their negativity onto me I will block their flow. This may be with a firm word,” No!” it may be by physical relocation (of myself away from them if they will not leave) or it may be by informing them that their behaviour towards me (has never been acceptable and) is no longer allowed into my life.

When poison is threatening to flow into a pure water source it has to be redirected and obstructed. I know it is my right to keep my channels of thought clear. I think there are surprises ahead when people encounter my “no entry” blockades.

There was this piece of dry toast ...

Jokes bring out laughter – well, that’s the desired effect usually.

Jokes sometimes lighten a serious situation by the injection of humour.

Jokes can bring people together or tear groups apart.

Jokes are like a smooth covering of butter on a dry piece of toast when one is following a strict diet: an act of rebellion.

Freud would agree. We need more humorous revolutions.