Waiting

In films you sometimes see the moment of impact before it happens. Everything seems to go in slow motion. 

The knife glints, the bullet flashes and time freezes.

There seem to be moments like that in real life as well. When you are just waiting for something terrible and inevitable to become a fact ... of the present, and then – all too soon, of the past.

What I’ve found is that sometimes you have to wait for things that you don't want to happen. I always found it difficult to manage those moments. While thinking about my journey and others’ current journeys I wondered ‘how are you supposed to manage those moments?' I still don’t have any answers to give; all I have is my deepest love for those who are waiting in pain-lined days.

Like the scene in the film the first pain is expected and semi-prepared for. However, it’s the repeated aftershocks that also cause so much distress.

No one ever feels the same as anyone else when this happens. Each pain is unique. All I can offer is my love and friendship. You alone know how you feel in each moment and when you can reach out for ... anything. So I wanted you to know I am here for you if or when you need me. You remain in my heart, always.

Much love,

M.

Nature watch

Happiness is sitting in the evening sunshine watching a vixen and her three cubs playing in the hedges. The cubs play with each other and run and roll without fear. They chase birds that alight near them. They are curious about everything.

As I walk slowly forward to the fence to observe them, the mother goes onto high alert and, with ears pricked up, she faces me head on. She looks directly at me, daring me to do her cubs any harm. They have picked up on her sense of potential danger and have moved their play closer to where she is rooted to the ground. But still they play.

She watches me as I watch her. Then she slowly slinks away along the border of the trees. Her three cubs obediently follow her.

I continue to watch them. She continues to watch me. The cubs have no interest in me.

They are learning how to be ... themselves in this environment. Nature ... watching.

Waiting

How much of your life do you spend waiting? By that I mean waiting for things to start in your life. You’ve no doubt heard (or said) these phrases before ... “I’m just waiting for the right person,” “I’m waiting for the right job”, “I waiting for something to happen ...” or “I’m just waiting to see”.

What I have realised is that I mustn’t spend all my time waiting for something to happen in my life for me to get involved in proactive living - because my life has already “started” and it’s all about here and now.

It’s up to me to direct the next moment, it’s up to me to write my own life script.

I cannot wait for any external influence to create my present or future. That ability has been given to me. I must use it, and quit waiting.