Love is in the air ...

There’s something about a wedding that sets people thinking that all the (perceived) single people should be married. Then their plan is hatched and you are swept up in the rush of overpowering love (or something masquerading as love at least).

It’s at times of these heightened emotions that I have seen people act like they are the Henry Ford of love: ‘one domestic set-up suits all’ is their mantra. ‘It works for me so it must work for you as well’ is the well worn phrase that is thrust upon every unsuspecting singleton.

The only thing I have to say is ‘Why?’

Any disagreement to their proposals is met with a Shakespeare like zeal of ‘The lady doth protest too much, methinks’. But all I have to say to that is one size does not fit all in the love question.

Talking of proposals, I received a couple today. I really think love is in the air, but the tornados off the American coast must have misdirected the love aim. When I said, with genuine affection, to a friend that I hope to get an invite to his wedding he paused then replied, ‘Yeah, of course. But ... you know it should be you I’m marrying. If things were different ... I know how things stay, but it should be you I’m marrying.’ I wonder if he will tell his girlfriend about this conversation.

The other suggestion was more veiled and innuendoes littered the conversation like autumn leaves in a gale force wind. I’ll leave this bit to your imagination but I’ll just let you know that it had something to do with friends with benefits, and I’m not talking about the state distributed benefits either!

When I shared a filtered version of these points of amusement sometime in the early evening, I was questioned to laughing point because my son – incredibly interested in these mysterious suitors – only really wanted to know if I was being pursued by a ‘girl or a boy’. Now that would be telling! (Although now you have at least 50% of that question answered.)

M went to bed without his curiosity being satisfied. To use a phrase of currently popular vernacular both he and they were ‘denied’.

Piloting your own life

Days are always busy. We get busy just living, merely existing and making ends meet can take up all our energies. It can get to such a situation that we no longer have any time available for the small pleasures of life because we are so overrun with the repetitive and necessary tasks that make up 21^st century living. Working, paying bills, shopping, cooking, ironing, cleaning … after a while we can seem to be in a daze as we stumble through life always trying to catch up with something.

Managing resources, time and focus are all important as you become the pilot in your own life. You need to manage the small aspects of your life so that you can take the lead in your whole life.

It takes conscious effort to:

PLOT YOUR DESTINATION

MAINTAIN YOUR COURSE

HOLD FIRM TO YOUR CONVICTIONS

It is advisable to become the captain of your own life instead of getting lost in the trance that we sometimes accept as living. When you make the choice about your future you give yourself FREEDOM to be YOU.

This calls for consistency as you …

“Manage the small, seemingly insignificant things in order to direct more important matters of life.”

(Dave Pelzer, Moving Forward)

We have to have an AMBITION and … work towards it.

Happy New Month

Well, another month is here. Another step into the new year and all I am doing is remembering the past. Just last month masses of people all began to look forward to the new decade, new year, new start. I joined in as well. It's easy to go with the crowd. However, some things pull on my heart and mind a great deal more than prospects of the future (but, don't get me wrong, I am looking forward with hope and great anticipation).
Past loves, people who I have lost contact with, friends who I thought would be in my life forever. I sometimes sit and wonder where they are. Why we don't speak any more. Is it best to leave it all well alone?
I guess some of it is about accepting that I just did not fit into their lives the way they wanted me to. I still miss them though.

I am really, really bad at letting people go.
Maybe it's because I had to let go of my mother really early (when she died) and I didn't manage that at all well. Still not managing it well now. Who knows?

Sometimes I regret decisions I made that have led to this loss but I must accept that I made the choice at the time - whatever it was I did, I chose it - and there must have been a good reason then, even if I don't remember it now.

I will stop beating myself up and start making room in my life for new friends, new memories and happy times.

I will not, however, ever forget the past loves. My life is forever marked with our times together - and I miss you, still.