Loving the word ‘no’

Often we do not understand just how grateful we should be for the times when things have worked against our initial plans.

In the moment when we want to hear a ‘yes’ the opposite answer holds no attraction whatsoever. It is only when time may have passed and different things have happened that we see the true colours of the answers we wanted and were given.

I have recently wanted a situation to be so different, but it didn’t turn out the way I desired. It wasn’t pleasing to me; in fact I was morose for a while. But then as I lived the other avenue that I didn’t choose I saw things in a different light: I realised that if my plans had gone ahead the way I wanted them to I would have been walking into the most awful disaster.

Smiling to myself – in ‘No Avenue’ I realised that it was a brilliant thing to hear the word ‘no’.

You see, I can see across to ‘Yes Highway’ and know that it is more like Spaghetti Junction that the free flowing thoroughfare that I thought it was.

And right now I am loving the word ‘no’.

A fine balance

Circus performers have the knack of balance on a tightrope. In my everyday life, that often has circus-like qualities, I also have to obtain a balanced way of doing things.

I have found that if I spend too much time making other people happy then I never have time to focus on my own happiness. The reverse is also true: if I become too self-centred then I cannot see anything beyond my own nose as I sink into myopia.

Life is a fine balance.

Yes and No

I was reminded yesterday of something I have been saying to my younger sister for years, I have been telling her to think about saying ‘yes’ to people all the time because she is effectively saying ‘no’ to herself at the same time.
My advice to her seems to have helped her. I’m pleased for that.
Now it’s time for me to take my own advice.
I have been a people-pleaser for too many years to count: if you make them happy then they’ll like you – right?
Maybe.
But the flip side is they may like you for the time when you are pleasing them and making all their dreams come true, but will you like yourself?
Are you happy saying ‘no’ to yourself repeatedly?
Is it fair to deny yourself when you really want to say ‘yes, yes, yes’ to the things, time, space, peace … that you crave?
I think ... balance is required.
A little more ‘me time’ so that the resentment will fade and the happiness can be shared between you … and me.
Sounds fair, don’t you think?

‘Yes’

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