Sometimes it is possible to sabotage yourself by being too busy.
If you are too busy you cannot fit everything you want to do in the time that you have and you know that you will fail – it all – because nothing will ever be done to any degree of satisfaction.
This thought has been in my mind repeatedly as I go about my tasks over the past few days.
At times it seemed as though I was trying to fit five minutes of effort and achievement into a single minute: it would never work. I started one task and on the way to finishing it I concluded that before I did so I would just ... yes, I used those words in my head, ‘I would just...’ a fatal combination of words that mean the task in hand is going to be delayed while another one takes the priority slot.
This continued for about half an hour until I realised that I was standing with several things in my hand, unwilling to put any of them down, because they were all on their way to somewhere else. I had picked up small distractions on my way to the completion of my first job and now I was unable to finish the first job. In fact, to be fair and honest about it all, I barely remembered what I had started out with the intention of achieving.
I was stood with an odd assortment of things in my hand, wedged into my pockets and under my free arm.
After repeating this crazy procedure for three days I have realised that I need to set myself small tasks to complete and do them without distraction. One task done well is much better than five tasks all done badly.
I have taken off the mindset that directed me into sabotage overload and, with my blinkers on, I will focus on the task at hand. Sleep.